The First DDO Review

The first review of Dungeons and Dragons Online: Stormreach (DDO) is out! And the review is excellent! I'm really really definitely getting it.

It's still not in Malaysia yet of course, at RM 189 (at the Software Boutique), it's much cheaper than World of Warcraft and Guild Wars when they came out. Still, as my friend pointed out, there's still the matter of a monthly bill. Oh well, I'm still trying to convince myself not to get it and buy the next expansion of Guild Wars (coming out next month or so) for the simple fact that there's no subscription fee involved. But... but... I'm a D&D fan, how can not play DDO? To buy... or not to buy. That, is the question. Heh.

New Look

Woohoo! First release of new look. Been tweaking this for quite a while, yet there are still quite a few tweaks I'll want to try out later. Aside from more hacking and tweaking of the template, still waiting for the time to check out del.icio.us, more Technorati stuffs, Google's AdSense, and Flickr.

EDIT: A bit more tweaks are in... ^-^

5 Years for Manslaughter

What?! Five years for manslaughter? Only? This is turning out to be another of those silly "Malaysia Boleh" thing again. What sort of justice and fairness is a simple 5 years sentence to the 5 Thais who beat one of our own countrymen to death? How can the court expect the victim's family to feel consoled by such a sentence?

Since when has the sentence for manslaughter be similar to the sentences of snatch thefts? While I do understand the point where the victim was most likely provoking the Thais and likely "digging his own grave" as they say, given the reactions of the Thais on hearing the sentence, it is obviously too light. A sentence doesn't give joy to the perpetrators, they should be dreaded of it and makes other people feel fearful, as a deterrent and lesson never to do it again. 5 years only is almost a mockery of the worth of a person's life.

Money No Enuf

You know, I realised that given all the things I want to buy and own, discounting the really expensive ones, I can easily blow RM 10K in a book shop or a hobby shop. Sigh. Me and my possessive nature. "Possessive" is a trait my girlfriend identified. I didn't really think of it as "possessive" before; before she mentioned it, it was just a "want". Must... resist... temptations...

Juggling with the Time of your Life

I'm a loner at heart; which is the reason why news and gossip always reach my ears last (or not at all!). Is it a bad thing to be socially disinclined? In pure honesty, I'd rather play games or read a good book than go out on weekly or even nightly social activities. Disco? No thanks. Bar? Nah. Dinner? See-lah. Mamak? Maybe. I don't feel good turning down good friends. Sorry all.

Maybe I just need to trim away some of my interests. Perhaps give up on some things that I keep myself up-to-date with and focus more on other parts of my life. Which parts? Family and friends for starters. As life goes on, more and more people appear who'd need a share of your time and devotion. I know I've been neglecting alot of loved ones, especially the closer ones. Worse when I give unfair shares. Sometimes, I just feel reluctant to give out a share when my own share is already small. Or maybe I'm just blind to how much I'm hoarding to myself.

Life, I believe, is about personal enrichment and experience. But how do you specifically define that? By doing things that make you happy? By doing things that make others happy? Or somewhere in between? How much of your own life should be dedicated to others? How much is too much?

Religion aside, we only have a lifetime each. Is it really selfish and foolish to want to spend it to the betterment of the self? Is it really noble and praiseworthy to spend it to the betterment of others?

I think the corrects answers would both be yes. Without those who sacrifice, there won't be a better tomorrow. Life is not a lonely road. Life is all the more richer by the lives of others we enrich. Life is more about the giving than the receiving.

I'm still trying to convince myself. God help me.

English Problem

When the government decided to steamroll the decision to have all Maths and Science subjects to be taught in English back in 2003, I had anticipated alot of problems, problems like this. There was simply not enough planning and consideration for the sudden switch from the national language to English. But the government probably thought this might force people to improve their English skills.

As it is, it's doubtful that it's been an effective move towards raising our national standards of English, Math and Science proficiency. It's rather shocking that our public universities, UPM, UKM, and UM are actually having problems teaching in English. The rub is that it's not the students who are facing problems, it's the lecturers themselves. Maybe these lecturers should attend English classes together with the students.

Not Enough Time

Is it just me or do most people realise that time is an extremely limited resource? I have this ex-colleague who finds the time to read books, read mangas (Japanese comics), watch anime (usually Japanese animations), read ebooks, watch movies, watch TV series, watch reality shows, play games (PC and PS2), as well as find the time to work. Everything's appears to be done in a volume or quantity that's more than me. Is it really true that everyone gets the same amount of time? I'm starting to doubt that. Or maybe it's just because I have other time-consuming activities... like driving to and from house every week day, or going shopping (not fully my idea... :P ) Sigh.

Let's see... I'm currently reading 2 novels, with 34 more sitting on the shelf, following 4 mangas, catching up on 2 animes, with at least 5 more lining up to be watched, about half-a-dozen movies I wanted to watch but haven't found the time, currently playing 3 PC games, waiting for the time to play another 4 PC games (2 of them MMORPG), playing 1 PS (yes PS, I don't have PS2) game, have 3 other PS games lined up, 2 gaming news websites to cover, articles and forums for D&D and MtG to catch up on, technology news to watch, and development forums to check out.

And those are just my leisure stuffs. There are alot of chores I need to be doing. Dental checkup, checking up on my housing loan, wedding plans, cleaning up my storage space, preventing my cacti my really dying off, fixing a bad scatch on my car, keep my car washed and clean, spring cleaning, as well as keeping up a semblance of activity on this blog. That's all I can currently recall.

Sigh. How can time ever be enough. Or maybe I'm just trying to do too many things at once. Life is at such a fast pace. I should probably really sit down and figure out exactly what I want from it before it's over.

The Daily WTF

Here's a fun little blog I found out about while reading the comments on a post on a friend's blog posted by another friend. It's called The Daily WTF - Curious Perversions in Information Technology. A really funny read regarding the weirdos and "smart" people that happen to be in the same line of work I'm in. Technical, but classic, stuff.

The Da Vinci Code

I'm currently reading The Da Vinci Code by Dan Brown. I must say it's been an interesting read (finished about three-quarters). While the story is intriguing and the author is a fine writer, I believe the one main reason it's taken the world by storm (since 2003 I think) is because of the controversial views it presented of Christianity. I am quite ashamed to admit that I was actually quite taken in by the disclaimer page titled "Fact", which went on to state that "all descriptions of ...documents, and secret rituals in this novel are accurate."

After googling a bit and surfing around, I am relieved to find my doubts to be foolish notions so easily planted by a masterful storyteller. Sigh. Still alot of space my faith needs to grow into. Anyway, here are some of the debunking views and statements made by those of the faith and historians: here, here, here, here, here, and here. It was kind of a relief to find out that others had doubts too... phew...

What I was wondering about is the author's view on his story. Does he believe about the so-called facts and hard evidence (despite being rather shaky) or is this just a marketing move designed to make his books bestsellers? It certainly did propel his books to fame. Or is this even some kind of conspiracy? We'll never know I guess, but I do know this:

That disclaimer page which claims the facts being presented are true is very very bad... it will seriously mislead any who are not familiar with Christianity and drive away those who are already apathetic, ignorant, or hostile to Christianity.

To all who have read The Da Vinci Code, are reading it, or plan to read it, please bear in mind that it's fiction. Come to think of it, I must be pretty gullible or shaky in my faith to get all worked up like this.... Oh well, time for a prayer.

A New Beginning

Know what? My engagement ring is sitting on my girlfriend's finger. And you all know what that means... Woohoo! I'm now engaged and no longer available (not that anyone else really cares whether I'm available or not...).

And that's not the only thing that's marking the start of another phase of my life. We just placed our booking for a rather nice house; it comes with a rather big price tag but we have support and encouragement from both families so we went ahead.

Wow, two big commitments in a single day. Time to really grow up (and tighten my belt... no more snacks and supper). Have to budget things really carefully now, both to pay the initial payment as much as possible, and to leave enough to get some basic furnishings as well as preparations for the coming marriage.

Thank you Lord for such a wonderful family. Thank the Lord for my beloved. And thank the Lord for all His blessings.

A Fork in the Road

I've recently arrived at a fork on the road of life. I got an opportunity to work in a large multi-national corporation as opposed to staying in this current small start-up company. Let me organise my thoughts...

The pay's only slightly better, but the benefits are definitely very much better. Of course, given the new location, the transportation costs and traveling time may well increase, so it's more about the job.

It's a change of environment and is a new beginning, with lots to learn and opportunities for new contacts. But I'm neither fond of changes nor making new contacts. I wasn't good at people skills to begin with and haven't picked up enough yet. But of course, I have to learn at some point. Also, let's just say that my technical skills probably won't be in any challenging or interesting situations; which is bad, since I'd much rather face a computer than a customer.

I'd get to periodically travel to new locations. That might be good, except most of the time, I'd rather be at home. Being away from weeks and months at a time is, well, unexciting at the very least (to me anyway).

The job doesn't feel bad at all, but I can't help feeling apprehensive about it. The road seems to lead to a point where I had no interest in going. So what's wrong with changing again if I don't like it? Because there's still quite a bit I can learn by staying. There's an expert (a damn good one) in the house.

Currently, things might not feel stable, but I was reassured it's more stable than it looks. And I did say I'd stay until Chinese New Year, to see how things go after all the hand-overs. Plus, I have this promise of a good job with even better pay after the festive period... we'll see.

Oh my... I'm leaning towards staying. Can you believe it? Truth to tell, after quite a bit of chats with my (relatively small) circle of friends, I do, in fact, rather stay on than change jobs.
What?! Are you crazy?! Yeah, yeah, maybe I am. I actually feel sad about leaving. There's so much potential in the product, if only we can get past that point of actually selling it. Some of the objections put forth by my pals (my beloved included):

• Wait for Chinese New Year lah, more jobs, find more alternatives.
  
• You donno how to talk to customers wan lah, sure kena bully.
  
• You sure? I thought you just like to interface with computers?
  
• Ask you mamak oso you lazy, some more want to go overseas ah?
  
• A bit waste loh, since haven't close shop, faster ask for promotion lah!

Well... as mentioned, sooner or later you'd have to learn. Right now, I'm thinking later. All those talks and ponderings have actually brought out some resolutions for next year. I even made a list of things I need to improve on. But first and foremost, I need to pick up:

• Better code and design skills. Basically, more technical know-how.
  
• Professionalism. These days, I haven't been working as I'm being paid. Letting morale and feelings cloud my judgment. You can hate your job, your colleagues, or your superiors; but work is work. Personal feelings should never influence the results of which you're being paid for.
  
• Leadership and team skills. I need to learn this anyway, so what better way to do it than in a working environment I'm familiar and comfortable with?
  
• Basic business logic. I need to learn this anyway, so might as well try to pick up some concepts.

Bad choice, good choice? Only time will tell (wah cheh, like I'm making a really big decision like that... :P ). But a decision has been made. I better go apologise to those whose efforts I wasted.

You are Blessed

A colleague forwarded this to my inbox yesterday morning. It's very meaningful in that we should always look at what we have and not what we don't have.

If you woke up this morning
with more health than illness,
you are more blessed than the
million who won't survive the week.
If you have never experienced
the danger of battle,
the loneliness of imprisonment,
the agony of torture or
the pangs of starvation,
you are ahead of 20 million people
around the world.
If you have food in your refrigerator,
clothes on your back, a roof over
your head and a place to sleep,
you are richer than 75% of this world.
If you have money in the bank,
in your wallet, and spare change
in a dish someplace, you are among
the top 8% of the world's wealthy.
If your parents are still married and alive,
you are very rare,
especially in the United States.
If you hold up your head with a smile
on your face and are truly thankful,
you are blessed because the majority can,
but most do not.
If you can hold someone's hand, hug them
or even touch them on the shoulder,
you are blessed because you can
offer God's healing touch.
If you can read this message,
you are more blessed than over
two billion people in the world
that cannot read anything at all.
You are so blessed in ways
you may never even know.

My pastor talked about covetousness during the previous mass, about the tenth Commandment. We should always be content with what we have, and not only lament what we don't have and dream about what we want. It's probably difficult to achieve (since I'm guilty of it in so many ways), but when you do, you'll find life much happier when you feel like you already have all that you need.

Work Professionally

I was told that someone said we should work professionally until the very last day, as a matter of ethics and professionalism. I have a problem with that. I'm not leaving (yet) and I'm also not really working (not a good sign).

What does it mean when you don't feel like putting any effort into your work? Is it the fact that I'm getting unrealistic tasks to work on? Tasks that I'm ill-equipped to tackle? Is it the management's fault for the company's low morale? Or is it my own fault for not being mentally stronger to resist this lethargy?

If I wasn't right in the middle of this situation, I might have found it hilarious. With people from finance doing HR, those in HR don't really know how to do HR, those from consulting doing management, a non-techie is the lead tech person, and sales and marketing not closing any sales and not doing any marketing. Even worse, pluses are allowed to leave seemingly without much effort to retain them, while minuses remain to leech without much effort to get rid of them.

Sounds grim doesn't it? There are so many cracks and holes already; I wonder if it's still repairable. End of rant.

Dream Job

I dream about having a job in a games company like Blizzard or BioWare, famous makers of the Warcraft series of games and the Neverwinter Nights series respectively. Or perhaps Turbine Inc., developer of the upcoming D&D Online (woohoo!!). Or even Magic: The Gathering Online. Apparently, there is one more job that would be even better: the Pro Gamer. Check out this news on Johnathan Wendel. It felt unbelieveable, but see this interview and the same news posted on Yahoo! News. I think that fella just become my idol... a six-figure salary! Gaming! He even has this snazzy-looking website, Fatal1ty, his screen name, and his own branded merchandise. Wow. I feel so insignificant.

Bad Luck and Bad Etiquette

There I was, parked along the road right next to the entrance of Pudu bus station, waiting for my girlfriend's bus to arrive, thinking that I had a good spot. I usually stop a bit further back as I didn't want to risk not finding a spot and having to one big round again. A lot of cars came and went, some stopping close to mine, so they could just drop someone off or pick someone up before going off. It was just my luck that this Kancil driven by a Malay girl (from the tudung, or head covering), with some driving skill deficiency, bumped her side-view mirror against mine, folding mine forward (I'm thinking it was really lucky it could fold). The Kancil just kinda slowed, slowed, then went off, the driver not looking back at all, not even a glance or stare, much less any apologetic signal. When I righted the side-view mirror again, I noticed a rather obvious scratched patch. Sigh. Just my luck. I cursed that driver a little. Even she had just stopped, glanced back, motioned something that I may interpret as an apology, I just might've spared her the cursing. Cursing someone is sinful. Darn it.

Color Quiz

Seeing that my sis took the ColorQuiz and posted the results, I decided to shamelessly do the same thing:

Your Existing Situation
Seeks to share a bond of understanding intimacy in an esthetic atmosphere of peace and tenderness.
whoa... really?

Your Stress Sources
The tenacity and strength of will necessary to contend with existing difficulties has become weakened. Feels overtaxed, worn out, and getting nowhere, but continues to stand his ground. He feels this adverse situation as an actual tangible pressure which is intolerable to him and from which he wants to escape, but he feels unable to make the necessary decision.
yup yup

Your Restrained Characteristics
Willing to become emotionally involved, but demanding and particular in his choice of a partner and in his relations with those close to him. Needs reassurance and is careful to avoid open conflict since this might reduce his prospects of realizing his hopes.

Able to achieve satisfaction through sexual activity.
interesting... i didn't know that :P

Your Desired Objective
Suffering from pent-up overstimulation which threatens to discharge itself in an outburst of impulsive and impassioned behavior.
beware! all of you!

Your Actual Problem
The tensions induced by trying to cope with conditions which are really beyond his capabilities, or reserves of strength, have led to considerable anxiety and a sense of personal (but unadmitted) inadequacy. His inability to enforce his will causes him to over-react in stubborn defiance and by assigning to others all the blame for his own failures.
It's not my fault I tell you, not my fault!! lol

Magic the Gathering

A friend of mine has gotten me back into playing Magic: The Gathering (MTG) collectible card game (CCG) again. Here's the wikipedia entry for it. And here's the Wizards of the Coast (WotC) website for MTG.

Briefly, it's game where each player is considered a wizard or spellcaster, with his "spells" being made up of a collection of cards, usually 40 or 60 cards (many variants exist). A player starts the game with 20 life points, and the game proceeds with each player taking alternate turns to attempt to bring about spells, creatures, and effects to bring the opponent's life total to zero. WotC actually went and created a very nice introductory program for newcomers, if you're willing to wait for the long download. It's worth it for those interested. Or you can just browse or download the rules.

WotC recently released the latest expansion set of Ravnica, the start of a new block after the Kamigawa block (made up of Champions, Betrayers, and Saviors of Kamigawa). An expansion set is just a set of cards within a card block. A block consists of cards linked thematically. I stopped playing during the Ice Age and Homelands sets with the 4th Edition core set way back in 1995. It's now 9th Edition, which was released last year. A core set is simply the current main set of cards.

Magic has really changed alot since I last played. I'm getting addicted all over again. I's a pretty expensive hobby though, so I recently drastically cut down on all games and movie expenses. A good-enough deck can be constructed with around RM50, although it'll never be tournament quality. Some cards can even reach several hundred ringgit (each!). I would say that the statement "the richest player wins most often" holds a much lesser degree of truth than some other CCGs, like Yu-Gi-Oh. Going RM100 is often quite enough to get a good deck for casual play that will lasts through the years. And just so you know, you can be a pro Magic player, just like a pro chess player or pro golfer. The tournaments aren't as glamourous or as rewarding, but I'd say thousands of US dollars ain't bad at all...

Magic consists of 5 different spell colours, each symbolizing different themes, flavour, or ideals. For those of you who already know Magic from before 2002, here's to tell you that Magic underwent a long design session to redefine and clarify each colour. Here's an insight into what each colour represents (in chronological order):

• Green - life, growth, nature
  
• White - order, law, purity
  
• Blue - knowledge, manipulation, artifice
  
• Black - power, decay, death
  
• Red - emotion, might, chaos

Each colour is allied to two colours, and opposed to the other two colours; sitting on the points of a pentagon. And given that Ravnica's focus is in colour pairs (which is very nice and exciting btw), new articles regarding each pair are out (in chronological order):

• Green/White - for the good of the group
  
• Black/Green - the cycle of life and death
  
• Blue/Black - omniscience and omnipotence

Disposable Email

Ever been in situations where you need to use a valid email to register a service you'd only want to use once? Such as trial versions of software you're checking out, or registering for forums you just want to browse for answers once? These are times when you'd rather not give away your primary or secondary email addresses.

Mailinator has a good answer. Simply come up with any email address you want (15 characters max.) and use it for whatever purpose requires a valid email address. For example, "sendthistome@mailinator.com", or "whatyouwant123@mailinator.com". Once the email is sent, just go to the above website, and check your inbox using your randomly thought up email as the inbox name. Tada! Your email's right there.

The only drawback I can think of is that you'd probably not want sensitive information sent this way, since anyone could potentially think up the same "random" email as you did.

Lost Fingers, Hands, and Eyes

Each time the festive season rolls around, the daily news mostly includes an article or two of kids losing their sight, fingers, or the whole hand to playing with firecrackers. Some say these kids are naughty, peeling off all the wrappers and gathering the combustible gunpowder for one big bang, not knowing the danger they're in. Some say they are foolish, for naively holding lit firecrackers that didn't go off. These children will bear these scars for the rest of their lives...

Who is to blame? The government for not passing stricter laws? The police for not enforcing them and preventing the smuggling of firecrackers? Or the smugglers and traders who traffick in these goods? If they are to blame, then they only play a very minor role.

The primary offenders are the irresponsible parents who bought the firecrackers and jsut handed them to their children without even considering the consequences. How can they justify the handing of dangerous items to children who likely have no idea what causes all the sparks and loud bangs? How could they sit and chat away by themselves and leave the children to play with firecrackers unsupervised? Is it this behaviour that I find most puzzling. And it is these few irresponsible adults that deprive the newer generations of the joy of watching and lighting firecrackers during festive celebrations. How much more wonderful would these times be for children if only that small minority would learn better.

Big Bad Bus

It took 5 minutes to find a parking space. It took 5 minutes to walk up to the office. 10 minutes to get from Midvalley to Hartamas. But 70 minutes to get from my house to Midvalley.

Stupid bus had to break down right under the bridge connecting Old Klang Road to the Jalan Syed Putra and Midvalley exits, reducing the already small 2-lane bottleneck joining 4 lanes to one lane. The backlog that simple breakdown caused probably stretched all the way to Sri Petaling for all I know, seeing as to how the section of the road in front of OUG was already packed when I came upon it. My foot is sore. I could've gone to Klang for breakfast and back and still be earlier.

Wedding Rings

In case anyone's interested, and since I remembered neotrax's post on diamonds, I found a little primer on the wedding bands as well. More importantly, it talks about platinum versus white gold, and another on platinum wedding bands.

In summary of those links, here's are a few points which I think are interesting and rather significant:

• A ton of platinum ore only produces about an ounce (~28.35 grams) of platinum.
  
• Platinum is at least as strong as white gold, if not more.
  
• Platinum 950/1000 means 95% platinum. The other 5% is alloyed for casting and shaping purposes so it doesn't matter. But do note that some are 900/1000 (90%) platinum.
  
• White gold and yellow gold are the same metal, but different alloy.
  
• Yellow gold is gold alloyed with copper, zinc, and silver.
  
• White gold is gold alloyed with copper, zinc, and nickel.
  
• 24 karat gold is 100% gold. Pure gold is actually quite soft, softer than silver. It scratches easily. 18 karat gold is about 75% gold, while 14 karat gold is about 58.33% gold. The less gold in it, the more scratch-resistant, but less "gold-looking".
  
• A scratch on platinum or white gold is not an actual visible scratch. Platinum scratches causes furrows to build up on the metal, making it look frosted. Scratches on white gold actually removes metal, causing it to lose its whiteness and look yellow-ish.
  
• Apparently, burnishing a platinum back to shine is actually cheaper than doing the same for white gold. Platinum burnishing involves pushing or flattening the built-up furrows. Burnishing white gold usually involves coating on a layer of Rhodium (white-ish metal), possibly every 2 to 3 years. Platinum will always be white.
  
• Most interesting is that it tells of retailers biasing towards white gold due to reasons of economy. It makes more business sense to get rid of their white gold stock (since it's cheaper than platinum) than to order a new platinum band.
  

Realms of Evil Pantheon

For those who play D&D 3.0 and 3.5, and looking for a custom and very interesting evil-themed pantheon, I'd recommend these created by KingOfChaos in the forums of the Realms of Evil (more in D&D Links in the sidebar). Mature rating of course, in case you're offended by dark, but very creative, ideas. RPGers only I suppose.

For those who don't know, here's a quick overview: deities are divine beings in game worlds that grant power to their worshippers, who in turn channels the divine energy into spells and other abilities. Each deity is often aligned to particular theme, idea, or philosophy (termed portfolio), such as the sun, good, greed, nobility, etc. While there are hundreds and thousands of custom-designed deities for even more campaign worlds, this pantheon (a collection of deities) takes all portfolios traditionally aligned to good deities and twists them in a creative and diabolical way to fit an evil deity. Nice!

Realms of Evil Pantheon

• Felmara - She of the Whip, Denier of Death, The Crippled Hand of Healing, Merciless Mother
  
• Kromentar - Ruin of Knowledge, The Scar on Reality, The Overmind, The Master Liar
  
• Marchion - The Father of Invention, Flesh Hater, Death’s Factory, Bonecrusher
  
• Shevari - Mother of the Lost, Keeper of the Woods, The Dire Druid, The Killing Earth
  
• Sinesstra - The Dark Lover, The Hand of Betrayal, Lady of Grief, Murdering Matron
  
• Sorsancrot - The Winds of Death, Plague Lord of the Wind, The Fickle King, Traveler’s Bane
  
• Zinraak - Nightkiller, The Grand Tyrant, Giver of Deserts, The Ashfather, Hunter of Shadows

Edit: The forum was moved. Updated the links.

Another one of those if-onlys

Sleepy, sleepy... ZZZZzzzzzzzz No time to sleep much.

Just the other day, my sis and I got into the topic of how some people would actually complain about there being nothing to do and feeling bored. It's been a loooooonnnggg while since we last had such a feeling. So we wondered whether the problem is with us or with them.

An idea hit me at the time, inspired by a recent advertisement of Celcom (Malaysian mobile communications services provider) promoting their latest service: the sharing of phone credit. You could actually request/send credit to/from someone else. Then I thought how wonderful it would be to be able to send and receive time...

Imagine if I could just request an extra hour or two from a friend of mine who has nothing better to do. When my friend accepts, time would suddenly slow down a bit for me, and speed up a bit for my friend. Everybody's happy. Sigh, if only.

Is it really just me that I have so many things I want to do, but simply no time to do them all?

Oh well, wishful thinking, I know. This is probably even more unlikely that my other wishful thinking: a pill that replaces the need for sleep. :P

Original Games

Here I am looking for original games again. I've already bought a couple, but I plan on buying the original ones or games I really like, now that I can afford them once in a while. Problem is, it's really hard to find a good one.

I recently bought a Baldur's Gate 2 Collection box. It was a bit of a rip-off at RM169 and only containing 5 CDs. If they had included the manual and the map, it would've been fine. I wonder if the shop itself the one doing the packaging. Damn it. Having the manual and its assorted accessories is part of the reason for collecting original games.

Has anyone seen Neverwinter Nights and its expansions (two of them) being sold anywhere? It's really hard to find. The store in Sunway Pyramid says they don't carry it anymore. Sigh. Should I buy it from BioWare's store? I'd like to, but I hate our Malaysian customs, as digital media is not something they normally allow, which is why sites like Amazon don't ship to Malaysia. Sucks.

Anyone bought from PC Game before? I don't know, but it feels fishy. I'm just paranoid I guess, about a commercial website that has English problems. But then again, what local website doesn't have English problems? Even MPH's webstore does. But anyway, that site doesn't carry Neverwinter Nights anymore. It only carries new games. But I wouldn't have bought from there anyway. Doesn't have much of a customer confidence or customer feedback mechanisms.

Doing It

There are so many things I'd like to do, so many things I want to do. A colleague of mine said, "If you talk about it, you're not going to do it. Just do it."

I think that's very true. And I'm going to. I'll start with my worldbuilding project.

The Ethics of Smoking

I personally do not smoke. I have nothing against smokers in general as I have friends who smoke too. What I despise are inconsiderate smokers. People who believe they have a right to smoke, but deny others the right to breathe smoke-free air.

If you want to waste $$$ on packs and packs of cigarettes, that's fine by me, since it helps the economy. If you want to risk a shorter lifespan, that's fine by me also, since our world is over-crowded anyway. If you want potentially huge medical bills in your waning years, that's also fine by me, since it's not my problem. If you want to be a litterbug and throw all your cigarette packs and butts all over the country, that's fine by me too, because I'm not a law enforcer and can't stop you.

What I can't stand is that some of them simply love to smoke in small cramped spaces. It's either the toilet, the area outside the toilet, fire escapes or stairways, or even corridors. I mean, it's fine if it's a rarely visited restroom, pathway, or stairway, where you won't violate the breathing space of others. It's not a question of legality, but of morality. If they can't have respect for people who do not smoke, I don't see why they deserve any respect. Everytime I pass by the corridor or enter the toilet at my workplace, and I smell smoke; I simply curse the fellow in the next office (who's the only inconsiderate one causing the air pollution on the entire floor).

I'll have even lower respect for them if they dare complain about any smells of urine or garbage. What? They can pollute the air but others can't? It's mutual respect. Do not do unto others what you do not want done unto you.

I know I know, I'm just ranting. But I really really hate it when my shirt has to smell of smoke simply because some inconsiderate moron finds it entertaining to stand or sit inside the toilet to smoke. Not to mention the fact that these same fellows find it all right to dump the cigarette butts and ashes on the floor, in the urinal, the sink, or wherever they happen to be standing. While not having very laudable ethics, at least I know I'm not at the bottom.

Longing

My girlfriend is heading back to her hometown again for the weekend. And I'm torn between two different feelings.

First, due to my long working hours, I truly, truly appreciate any time that I can have feeling bored. I never knew being bored and not knowing what to do can feel so extremely wonderful. Sigh, busy busy busy. Hence, I simply love the weekends. Except when I have to work on Sundays of course. On such days, I just want to be left alone and doing whatever I feel like doing (including nothing of course).

But then again, I kinda miss her and wished she could be here next to me. Even though I'd rather be alone. I want to spend the time I have with her. Yet, I still enjoy spending the time alone.

Ah, longing. What art thou?

Maybe I should find a job with shorter hours...

Coincidence?

I meant to post this a couple of weeks ago but I kinda got sidetracked by other stuff. But now I shall try to put old thoughts into works.

I blogged about religion and the belief system quite a while back and have been struggling with it since. Funny. As was mentioned by a reader, the more we try to believe, the more mental obstacles we unconsciously put into place. Although I follow my girlfriend to church (well, mostly quite reluctantly), I find it difficult to put faith into something.

But last month, I had this weird experience. There was this guest speaker invited to talk about personal experience and bearing witness to God. Guest speakers come once in a while and they always invite non-Christians to affirm their belief or to join the faith. Sometimes I feel really touched and wanted to join in voicing out. Yet always, I just seem to hold back. Old uncertainties and questions I suppose.

At the end of it, during the silent prayers period that concludes an assembly, I prayed. I think that's the first time I've truly, really, prayed. Quoting Morgan Freeman in Bruce Almighty: "Now that's a prayer." :P Anway, I prayed that the Lord give me a sign, a sign that I should be here (read: church), and be able to find answers to my questions. I suppose I was (am?) in sort of a spiritual crisis.

Right after that prayer, an aunty (a really really friendly woman in the church) came and asked if I wanted to join in a class of introductory lessons on the faith. Coincidence? Divine intervention? I don't know, and perhaps will never know. But something clicked in my head. I just felt more open somehow, more accepting. A sudden moment of clarity and lucidity if you will.

And during that first lesson... a lot of answers came from the pastor's words and from the implications my mind made. All of a sudden, things seem so clear now. It's now up to me what to make of it.

Dungeons & Dragons Links

Links to Dungeons & Dragons resources.
Resources

• Wizards of the Coast D&D website.
  
• D20 SRD 3.0 and SRD3.5 for download. SRD stands for System Reference Document.
  
• Online SRD websites can be found here and here.
  
• Official D&D Game Rule FAQs.
  
• Official D&D Erratas.
  

Authors, Publishers, and Retailers

• Alderac Entertainment Group.
  
• Bad Axe Games.
  
• Bastion Press.
  
• EN World, a news and review site.
  
• Fantasy Flight Games.
  
• Green Ronin Publishing.
  
• Mongoose Publishing.
  
• Monte Cook's Malhavoc Press.
  
• Necromancer Games.
  
• Paradigm Concepts.
  
• RPGNow, for electronic book purchases or downloads.
  
• Sean K. Reynolds's D20 gaming website.
  
• Sword & Sorcery
  

Campaign Settings

• Planewalker.com (Planescape).
  
• Secrets of the Kargatane (Ravenloft).
  
• Spelljammer - Beyond the Moon.
  
• The Burnt World of Athas (Dark Sun).
  
• Vaults of Pandius (Mystara).
  
• World of Sulerin
  

RPG Resources

• ADnD Downloads, for homebrew stuffs.
  
• D&D Adventures, for more homebrew stuffs.
  
• Realms of Evil, for nasty, vile, evil, yet extremely creative homebrew stuffs.
  
• Seventh Sanctum.
  
• Wizards of the Coast D&D Boards.
  

Forgotten Realms Resources

• Candlekeep - the library of Forgotten Realms lore.
  
• Chosen of Eilistraee
  
• Dlabraddath - A celebration of the goodly races of D&D.
  
• Wizards of the Coast Forgotten Realms Boards.
  

Tools

• Fantasy Name Generator
  
• hailscape.com - NPC generator.
  
• Irony Games' RPG Tools.
  
• Jamis Buck's Generators.
  
• Monster Stat Calculator.
  
• MW Tools - stat block, dragon, race, and magic weapon generators.
  
• Soldarin's ECL Calculator.
  

Dungeons and Dragons!

Know what's better than my dream job of working as a computer games developer? A computer games developer developing games for Dungeons & Dragons!!!

After reading about the continued development on D&D Online, I wish I could be a part of that team. Such a lucky bunch of people. I really do believe that being really really busy at something you really really love (and getting paid for it) is a wonderful thing. The best one can ask for in a career.

In case you've been in some isolated camp away from urban civilised areas for the last couple of decades and have not heard of Dungeons & Dragons, I'll give a quick intro. But then, if you didn't, you probably wouldn't be reading this would you now? DnD is a role-playing game (it's the role-playing game (RPG). It's the father of RPG. RPGs are where you create a character and begin role-playing him or her in adventures designed and narrated by the Dungeon Master (a
fellow human who's in charge of how the game progresses). It's hard to explain in a paragraph., especially when I'm doing this during work :P I meant to type this several days ago too.

Check out the DnD quick links I have on the sidebar. It'll all open in a new window.

One more thing: D&D Miniatures.

I think it's better than Magic The Gathering, which is getting becoming too commercialised with all must-have rare and very rare cards out there. I'm seiously considering get some start packs, even if it's just to collect the miniatures. They simply look so good compared to other miniature games. I wonder if there's any active player group in Subang... Maybe I'll find the time to play... sigh. Guess not.

Conspiracy theories

1. Road builders and public works (water and electricity)
Ever noticed how those who lay the pipes or wires always comes after those who tar the roads? It's like they must wait (purposefully) until the road has been very recently and nicely tarred and resurfaced before proceeding to dig along the length of the whole road to put whatever it is they're supposed to put under the road. The worse thing is that resurfacing of the road after such works is simply horrible, and usually right along the side of the road, where your tyres roll on when you try to keep to the lane. Theory: "The public works/utilities people only dig up a road if and only if it has been recently resurfaced, to give a more constant and continuous source of income for those who resurface the roads."

2. Road builders and car suspension makers
Ever noticed how all new roads seem to less flat compared to the aged and cracked older roads? This is evident in new highways like the NPE and supposedly upgraded Old Klang Road. These "new" roads are bouncy to say the least, and one cannot even get a smooth ride for even 5 seconds while driving on these roads. Is there something wrong with our road builders? How come they can't build a stretch a flat road? Or at least something close to flat, not some tarred road that's attempting to mimick dirt roads. Theory: "This is simply to wear down a car's suspension faster so that car suspension makers get more business."

3. Highway concessionaires
Ever noticed that these days, all so-called major road upgrades always results in tolled roads? The NPE, Penchala Link (probably the world's first highway to actually do advertisements and promotions), Kajang Ring Road (soon-to-have toll booths rite?), etc. Weird isn't it? When it's supposed to be the government's responsibility to provide the country's citizens with better and more convenient roads. Also, notice that all new highways usually result in the road that it was meant to replace getting an upgrade as well. But that so-called upgrade usually has a side-effect, which is to make it more congested. NPE? Federal Highway has more cars than before. The NPE has much more traffic lights than before. It used to 1 or 2 lanes needing to wait to make a turn. Now the whole stretch has to stop, which simply creates more congestion. Same things with Penchala Link and LDP. And don't forget the traffic lights next to the toll plaza heading to Section 16 PJ from Section 17. Theory: "These guys don't build roads for convenience, they build roads purely for profit; and they try to get as many cars as they can on their new roads by making the old roads less favourable to travel on."

Handphone harrassing

I wonder if most have heard stories about people getting harrassing or prank calls from complete strangers. Well, it's been a few weeks since a friend of mine got a prankster coming from 012-9326934. It's not that I feel I'm helping to get revenge on that childish fella but attempts to actually contact that person was not successful; not that I expected otherwise.

I had even thought about writing about this and sending his number to our newspapers for publication. But I wonder if the newspaper would be allowed to publish the number without the owner's consent. So I'm placing it here. Hoping, just hoping, that if anyone knows the person holding the number, they'd be kind enough to let the fella know that I'm wondering about possible legal action. Yes, that friend, is a really close friend.

Gonna write to the network providers involved asking about this. Again, I repeat, 012-9326934, just so that search engines may find it easier, in case anyone searches for that number. Why someone would be so childish as to keep up prank calls and arrogant SMS is beyond me. I have reason to believe that the idiotic person behind this is a Malay guy. Why? Well, if I'm not mistaken, the '9' indicates Pahang. And the fact that the fella actually sent SMS in Malay asking why my friend did not pick up his call. Weird isn't it? Picking it up would merely result in some background noise. I once heard a girl giggling in the background from which sounded like a mamak stall. Some people have so much money they don't mind calling inter-state every once in a while.

Getting worked up for nothing? Well, when you start getting prank calls in the middle of the night as late as 2-3 am or as early as 5 am, then you'll see what I mean about getting harrassed. And it's not like it's letting up. Plus, I believe the number I posted is not the only one. There were at least 2 different numbers, both starting with '9'. The one I posted was just the most frequent. Sigh. Some people really have nothing better to do. To all who were kind enough to read this entry to the end: Feel free to make use of the posted number for any form of registration that would result in a lot of advertising SMS.

Buy ori? Where?!

Just the other day, I got the urge to buy an original game (Warcraft III, it's an urge that's lessening though), but I had trouble even locating it, much less buying it.

KLCC? Sure, some games there, but not much, Diablo II, Baldur's Gate II Collection, Icewind Dale Collection, a whole bunch of the Sims expansions... but no Warcraft III. Will they get new stock? Don't know. Mid Valley? Can't even see one selling a boxed PC game. Pyramid? Very few selections, mostly old games. 1 Utama? Haven't checked there yet. I think Subang Carrefour has a shop that carries some.... hmmm... should check.

The point is, sometimes it's not that people don't want to buy original software. It's pretty hard to even find a shop that sells a good variety. Want to buy Acrobat Reader? Uh... where? Photoshop? That's a tough one. Microsoft stuff? You're crazy to fork out that much $$$ ^-^

And then several days ago... or was it weeks... anway, I went surfing Amazon.com. Woo! Look at all the stuff that I want! And it's cheap, even considering the shipping costs! But as I proceeded to check out... nope, they don't ship software, books, or electronics to Malaysia, or to Asia Pacific for that matter. Darn. And I tried to check out alot of stuff :) Must be tax laws and policies and such. Sigh. Are Malaysian gamers destined to play only pirated games and use pirated software? I'm of the opinion that one really has to have very strong and rigid principles (like a colleague I know actually, but he doesn't play much games) to have the patience to actually wait for the title to actually get into Malaysia and then begin the hunt for it. I live in the capital and think original games are scarce. Imagine those living in smaller towns. And all this without mentioning how expensive it is to buy an ori game.

Java anyone?

I'm a programmer. Work day after day is churning out lines of code. But it's fun sometimes, as you wrack your brain trying to solve an elusive bug or producing just the right algorithm. The triumphant feeling you get sometimes justifies the previous scalp-scratching exercise. Ha! Don't let me scare you off though. I program mainly in Java, though I know alot others, just rusty in them by now.

As all programmers know, the tool with which you use to program is very important. My recommendation? vi. Yes, that Unix/Linux editor with an extremely steep learning curve. But once you get the hang of it, learning its nuances and secrets known only to the hardcores, it's a wonderful editor, not just for programming. Don't have Unix/Linux? Try gvim, the Windows version! vi (or vim) can do just about everything a sophisticated IDE can do, but at a much much much smaller size and faster speed. And there are several things it can do that modern IDE can't. vi has syntax highlighting (for dozens of syntactical stuff, even some obscure ones), text replacement, macros, hundreds of quick shortcuts to accomplish editing needs, code folding, method browser, method traversal, registers for copying, window splitting, sorting, aliases, key mappings, visual selection, regular expressions for just about anything, save options, encryption, initiating compilation within the editor, color schemes, allows plugins, and quite a few more I can't think of right now. Phew. Yes, it's that good.

But of course, you sometimes just can't beat the visual look of an integrated IDE. My favourite at the moment is NetBeans, which is a free open source development platform that supports just about anything about Java. It has official Sun support too! Of course, for those who do not prefer NetBeans, they usually prefer Eclipse, which appears more flexible as it is not limited to Java. Put in the right plugin, and you can start writing code in some other programming language. NetBeans is now version 3.6, while Eclipse is 3.0.

Download quick links: gvim, NetBeans, Eclipse.

Unlucky 'saman'

As a law-abiding citizen, well, mostly a law-abiding citizen, I got my first official 'saman'. That's a Malay word for fine.

And no, it's not a speeding ticket, it's not for continuing through a junction during yellow or red lights, and it's not for neglecting to insert coins into the parking meter. It's for obstruction of traffic of all things. And me, someone who simply abhors people who "double-park" or park in such a way that they inconvenience other drivers. "Double-park" is a term coined for those who park their cars parallel to legal parking spaces such that they still allow the inner parked cars to exit but block traffic on the road.

Worse, I got the ticket during the day on a public holiday on a side road in Desa Sri Hartamas. The road was the one at the back, right next to the highway and near the place where you turn into the Penchala Link. The other entrance to Projet. Traffic there is usually light, what with that road being able to hold fours cars in parallel.

What I simply find so unlucky about the incident is that during normal working days, that road is simply packed with cars parked on both sides of it. And that's from early morning (about 8 am) up to late evening (about 7). No, that's not when the road starts to clear, it's when people start to double-park. And that goes on till past midnight. I know because I've been there at those times. I happen to work near there, and my working hours are pretty long.

And so it was during the afternoon of a public holiday along a deserted road, I got myself a warning notice. Ok fine, I said to myself, it's just a warning requiring that I send back the notice (which did not have an address by the way, it's really stupid that I had to go search the Internet) with a letter attached to explain why my car was parked there. I gave my reason that when I parked there, there were other cars there, and that for the whole time I've been working there, nobody ever said anything about cars in Desa Sri Hartamas getting any sort of fines. All those cars parked at illegal parking spaces and/or double-parking along the main (heavy-traffic) road that truly are obstructing traffic and causing massive jams never once got a ticket. I wonder if that's because my cars a lowly local make, most likely not owned by some rich guy with too much money in his pocket or someone who would have strings to pull to 'cancel' the fine.

This is so unfair. If I've gotten the ticket during a normal work day, when there's at least some moderate amount of traffic, and I've gotten that along with a whole road of cars, then that's fine. I accept that. But the way I got it made it seem such a farce. It's like my fine was to make up the quota of whoever wrote that fine. And I took the trouble of writing a letter to explain my situation (in Malay, which was pretty rusty already). Might as well don't bother if they're going to fine me anyway, without even a single acknowledgement of my letter. That letter stating the fine was most obviously computer-generated.

And so ends the 'saga' of my first ever, official, saman.

We don't want top-scoring doctors

Yup. You read that right. We don't want doctors who are also top-scorers. That's the implied meaning I'm getting from our DPM Datuk Seri Najib Razak. Other people might interpret his statements differently I suppose. Sorry, no time to find the right links for any non-Malaysian readers (I wish!).

The government cannot continue to guarantee all top scorers a place to do medicine in public universities by itself is true. This statement I can accept. But.... when it's made in the context that top-scorers are being side-lined for near-top scorers, well... I find that difficult to accept.

True, not all top scorers make good doctors. But what other measurement do we have? Sure, those 128 top scorers might all drop out when they find they don't like medicine. But what's to guarantee that the already accepted near-top scorers won't as well? Strange logic if you ask me.

What's even stranger is when the country's facing a shortage of doctors and all current doctors are being overworked, we're still rejecting potential doctors; seemingly without any previous planning to increase student intake for medicine. Even worse, some of our "learned" academics are even trying to deter potential doctors from becoming doctors. Even stranger logic.

And logically (for me), when I need a doctor, and when I don't know them personally (which is most of the time), I'd rather see one who was a top-scorer in a difficult internationally-recognised and established examination than another who was a near-top-scorer in a locally-recognised non-standardised examination of non-uniform standards.

Months at Work

It's been four and a half months since I started work. While learning quite a few stuffs, people have been leaving. And of the original group that was around when I came in, only a few are left. It's kinda disappointing to see the old familiar faces go, and then becoming the minority to fit in with the new faces all over again (well, it feels that way, ok?). But I guess that's how life is, people come, people go.

Plus, these days are becoming really busy, what with a long overdue deadline and all. Sigh. Starting to feel a little overwhelmed. Did an all-nighter recently, and long nights. Weird, but it's a kinda nice experience, although I'm not at all tempted to repeat such an experience. I hope things start improving soon. It's a nice place to work, just wish people can and will start going home earlier.

Flawed Creations

I've been meaning to ask someone about this but never did get around to it. Just last night, while having a dinner with colleagues, one of them mentioned an event that happened last weekend. My colleague, quite well-versed with Buddhist teachings, was approached by Christians attempting to get him to join a talk or gathering. One of the questions those Christians could not satisfactorily answer was why humans are flawed. I share my colleagues question.

If God created everything and He is Almighty, why did He create flawed products? Jesus gave his life for the people's sins. Yes, that's noble and all (if true), but why do people sin in the first place? Why did God create humans who could and would sin?

I've heard answers that it's because God gave us free will, where we could make decisions for ourselves. But why are we flawed in the sense that we give in to temptations easily? Could God not have created a race of people resistant to temptations? And where is the free will when rules exist as to how to conduct ourselves?

The world has not always been so. Adam and Eve lived in paradise, but Eve fell prey to the evil serpent's temptations to taste the forbidden fruit. Even the very first woman God created was flawed. Why did God create a flawed woman who would doom all Man to forever bear the burden of work and toil, and all Woman to the pains of labour and child birth? Why did God create a serpent that was evil? Why did He allow the serpent to do evil? And why did He create the forbidden fruit in the first place if He did not want Adam or Eve to eat it?

Indecipherable actions with infinitely deep meaning of an incomprehensible God? Or a greater truth that no religious person would dare ponder...?

Back for good?

Hi all! But I guess there's no body to 'Hi' to now. It's been pretty long. I don't know why but I'm getting an urge to expose all my personal thoughts out to the world again, hee. Still working, but no longer as a lecturer. I finally decided to go out and get some real working experience. And boy did I get what I was looking for. 9 -9 job as a software engineer for Tokuii Corporation. It's a CRM software company. Pretty nice group of people. And with me blogging on company time!

Guess not...

Guess I'm not altogether dropping this. I'll post when I have something to gripe about. I wanted to rant about the 'craze' that's been sweeping through a lot of our politicians, the one about how the act of raising one's national flag can instill patriotism (and yet still littering or proposing to change the national anthem); but I didn't. Figured it was kinda redundant and pointless. It's not like us saying something's going to change things.

And guess I'm not done with the religion issue either (mentioned before, it's just a month or 2 back). It seems that it is true that the more you attempt to convert someone to your religion and way of thinking, the more you'll succeed in antagonising and alienating them from it. At least, it's true for me. It's kinda like requiring me to change my lifestyle, my principles, and my way of thought simply for the sake of abstract concepts and rather idealistic goals. To change for the sake of changing is not an easy thing. Things are going downhill. I wonder how it'll turn out... hoping (praying? yeah right, like He'd listen, considering that I'm denying Him) for the best. Sigh.

Blog

I knew it. I'm losing steam for this blogging thing. Guess I'm not ready yet. Maybe I'll put in a word once in a while... Got too many things to take up my time still (mostly leisure!).

Time Management

Hmmm.... been quite a while hasn't it? Well, at least, in terms of those regular bloggers who put in something once every 2 or 3 days on average. I've been kinda busy... well, not busy with my working life (which, by the way, is pretty smooth and relaxed hee*2); but more like busy with my personal life. I'm learning how to juggle my work (preparing lectures, tutorials, labs, consultations, etc.), my part-time research (downloading stuffs, testing, writing reports), my interests (games, RPGs, TV shows, movies) and spending time with my girlfriend (just talking, cuddling, going out, shopping, etc. [but not into THAT yet :P not that I'm not interested ;) ]). Actually, it's more like trying very hard, not learning. Trying very hard not to put my priorities in the wrong areas!

Negaraku

Anyone else who read the news article "National anthem to be rearranged" published by the Star on July 31 felt as disgusted as I was? (Pelita Negara's opinion) There I was shaking my head and wondering what in the world those people are doing. Don't they have anything else to do? Don't they realise that all those songs that are being played over national television are horrible? None of the new songs could even come close to match the beauty and now classic 'Setia' (Loyalty). And here they are, trying to change our national anthem for the second time. Anyone heard of another country who changes (read: downgrade) their national anthems once every 10 years or so? Why not change the flag, our Rukun Negara, and our state names since we're at it.

A national anthem is not simply a song - it is the song that unites us all as a people, a nation. It should be a solemn and serious affair, not some marching song (currently), or a modern upbeat rhyme (probable new version). I remember back in primary days and early secondary, during assemblies, people would stand still and sing when the national anthem is played. I still remember feeling proud and patriotic singing it, especially when it was broacast at the end of transmission at around 12 mn or 1 am or so each day. I remember being impressed at the majestic song, and awe at its deep strength. When the change was effected, it was no longer deep and soulful, just another melody to be sung during assemblies, and pretty soon, only the headmaster and the prefects were singing it, and trying to cow the rest of us into joining in.

I really hope someone in authority would really stand up to this and force a change back to when it was first sung publicly during our independence. Then, and only then, would it be a national anthem that I will be truly proud to call our own.

Bruce Almighty!

For those who don't know yet, after the banning of Daredevil and the ICT debacle, we now have the proposed banning of Bruce Almighty.

Muzammil Daud's letter shows how poor his understanding of other religions is. I don't know about Hinduism or Sikhism, but the Chinese version of Buddhism has no problems with deities or fairies assuming human form, or giving us mortals the power of divinity. Yes, you shouldn't make fun of the divine, but the movie isn't about making fun of God! It's making fun out of a man with god-like powers!

Tunasing's suggestion on having two new categories for movies is brilliant. When we can have food outlets marked halal (edible by Muslims), why can't we have movies and TV shows deemed haram (illegal) for Muslims? It's time we become more open-minded and tolerant of other views. And here we are trying to be a developed nation, but incurring such views.

The worst part is that while Abdul Hamid Zainal Abidin, minister in the prime minister's department, claims that the show is inappropriate, he didn't bother consulting anybody about it. It was just what he thought. It's people like him and those on the censorship who think that they have a right to become our moral guardians and judge what we should and should not watch. If you say it's un-Islamic, then by all means, ban it to Muslims. This is being so insensitive to non-Muslims and free-thinkers who are denied the right to watch simply because half the population should not watch. And speaking of being un-Islamic, shows like Bedazzled, The Lord of the Rings, Harry Potter, Arabian Nights, Tomb Raider, The Mummy, and countless others should've been banned as well, simply for introducing elements of magic, the fey, and the divine. Another fine example of selective persecution; which, as I suspect, is due to something as simple as the word 'Almighty', similar to the word 'devil' in Daredevil.

If it's offensive to you, then don't watch it. I for one, want to, since I think it's a novel idea and the trailer is incredibly funny. So does my girlfriend (and she's a Christian!!). It's all about being open-minded and letting us judge the right and wrong of things by ourselves. Once I've watched it, I'll decide if it's insulting, offensive or blasphemous. Not some older, 'wiser' people closeted in small projector rooms who are likely with 'small' (narrow) minds. The piracy problem is already very bad, try not to encourage the populace into getting pirated but original (uncut) versions of movies or tempt them to download off the internet.

Marriage

I'm sure all you dating people out there have given thought about marriage right? I guess I'm in a dilemma. See, my girlfriend's older (a small number, but in years) than I am; so naturally, she'll start getting all that pressure to get married earlier than me. On the one hand, I don't want her to have to go through them each time she meet up with relatives (luckily her parents didn't); and on the other hand, I don't want to get married before I'm financially secure and ready. Solution? Work hard I guess. This lecturing contract, supplemented with part-time research claims, is probably not enough. Night job? One more part-time job? Sigh. Like a good friend of mine said: "You just have to make sure you grow up faster."

First Lecture

Phew! Just had my first lecture. It finished pretty early, considering it was the first and most of the material were basic stuffs. I wonder if I did all right? My mouth and throat were really dry after talking for so long. This is so very different from the tutorials and practical sessions that I had done before. I was quite nervous last night, but during the class, I was calm enough. Some of the students were pretty bored, it's so obvious - one even yawned. Sigh. We all don't like boring lectures but I really wonder how I can keep their attention without boring them. I remember certain teachers or lecturers that simply commanded attention, and when they're lecturing, it's tough to feel sleepy. I wonder how they do that.... Oh well, hopefully I'll figure it out soon. I give myself a passing mark for my first ever lecture ^-^.

Still busy

Rushing to do a lot of things. My girlfriend was referred to a good job and will be moving up to KL. Nice. Went up to Genting last Sunday for an overnight stay. It rained a little up there so it was pretty cold and not much rides were open. I've been on those roller coasters quite a lot of times already anyway. But that Slingshot ride was new... and totally exciting. It's sort of like bungee jumping: u get strapped into a seat, lifted up high, and then u fall down real fast, stop fast, shoot back up fast, then fall fast again, and repeating... each getting shorter and closer to the ground. I admit I've never been feeling so scared of a ride before... and we went twice (cos she wanted too, and me being a man, well, it's just too hard to say "u go ahead yourself", :P). Didn't go on much indoor rides though, and boy has it changed; it's been years since I was last up there for holiday. The new Snow World and Haunted Adventure looked fun, but we didn't go cos I kinda feel such attractions would be much more fun when there's a big group of friends or family. But we did go to the new Ripley's Believe It Or Not Exhibition. Pretty interesting things if you liked the show, and there's quite a lot of things to see too, not to mention they'll periodically change the exhibits.

Project Petaling Street

Oh, I guess I should post about Project Petaling Street too, since I'm a Malaysian. It's been launched and kudos to all those beta testers who helped. Check it out for a good listing of Malaysian blogs.

MyKad

Ooo... before I stop, I'd better say my piece about MyKad. Just the other day, The Star reported that the Director-General of the NRD commented on the under-utilisation of MyKad. MyKad utilises the smart-card technology and, at present, provides these 7 functionality or applications:

1. As an identification card,
2. A driving license,
3. International passport,
4. Storage of health information,
5. E-Cash,
6. ATM services; and
7. Touch n' Go and Public Key encryption infrastructure.
   

While there has been extension coverage of the benefits of the usage of a MyKad by the local media, there was hardly any discussion or information regarding its security and any contingency plans for stolen cards or information access rights. What happens when my card gets stolen? Will the thief with the appropriate reader be able to illegally use or sell my personal information? Or will I face discrimination when looking for a job or trying to get insurance based on my stored health information?

Belkisa Lim recently sent a letter to Malaysiakini. In it, the author mentioned a hotel booking incident using MyKad, the very first time the author made a booking. It seems that just based on the MyKad number, the person with the right tool can find out everything about you: including your name, phone numbers (home, mobile, and office) and address.

Frightening? I for one, think so. I value my privacy, especially my whereabouts on any given day. This sort of information easily allows the government to track our daily activities. I have a feeling that when the government finally makes it mandatory for all Malaysian citizens to switch to MyKad, our situation is going to be like the Americans and their Social Security numbers. With a simple number, everything about you and all you've done from the point of having the card can be recalled with a single click. My question is: Who has access to all this information? Why doesn't the government release information on the precautions taken to prevent such things? Or was there no consideration at all, given the government's track record of reckless implementation and lack of detailed planning?

Until the government forces me to, or assures me satisfactorily of its safety, I'm sticking to cards that each perform a specialised function.

Edit
Read this one by TV Smith.

Busy

I've got a lot of stuffs to do. I have to finalise and start producing something from the research work I'm doing for my supervisor; I have to start preparing subject materials for two subjects (new semester starts next week); and my girlfriend's coming down tomorrow (for which I'm extremely glad, although I must say I'll have to really try to slot in time for her). But at least this'll kick me back into a more active routine, rather than time passing slowly and uneventfully by.

Price Control

Kudos to RKK for noting that the government didn't bother with controlling the prices and demanding the pricing structure from our more basic amenities like phone, water and toll rates.

When the high-ups and investors mention the rampant intellectual property piracy prevalent in our country, we become witness to an era of rare police efficiency as well as tough policies and measures. When the public complains about some ridiculous rates we have to endure for public services, nobody seems to hear. And they are supposed to be "public" services, which apparently rank lower in priority compared to luxury items like optical discs.

The Belief System

Jas directed to me some atheists' sites in response to my previous entry on religion (July 2). I'm not a free-thinker. Definitely not one. I guess it's the fact that while I don't believe in the "rightness" of religions, I do believe in divinity. Somehow, I do get the feeling that there is a God somewhere out there, but it's just He/She/It is much more passive and doesn't care about how what we do. It's just like watching ants go about their business. How long would your attention span last if I told you to keep an eye on those ants crawling on your wall about their business? I'd more often than not smash my fingers into them! Muah-hah-hah-ha!!!

Ahem... Dead Serious Warning! Following paragraphs would be considered blasphemous by MOST if not ALL religions!

And just a little pondering: Did God create the world? If so, who created God? How did God exist in the first place? There's an alternate answer: Evolution created the world, WE created God. Wait, wait, before you all start screaming curses (again!) let me explain my thoughts. First off though, if anyone has at least more than passing knowledge of the world of Dungeons & Dragons (it's an RPG) and/or read Raymond E. Feist's fantasy novels. Anyway, since most people would be inclined to agree that our minds are incredily complex, and some believe that we are capable of extraordinary feats such as ESP, telekinesis, precognition and such. There's also this phrase: "If we put our minds to it, we could accomplish anything."

What's the whole point? Well, I'm just offering some reference to my thought: that because we humans have believed in the divinity for so long, divinity simply came into existence!! Incredible? Unbelievable? Think my basis is simply too baseless? Remember X-files? Or rather specifically one episode (I don't remember which season) about killer cockroaches. It deals with something call mass hysteria. That's just scratching the surface on the science behind our minds and our belief systems. Did you know that you can't always trust your mind? Sadly, I don't have links and no more time to search. It's said that our minds are horribly logical things, it simply has to interpreted in a manner in which it can be stored. If you encounter something that defies explanation, somehow, your mind will put it in focus and you'll "understand" it. This is actually one of the explanations given to (vague) reports of UFO sightings and ghosts. Because we simply couldn't explain it logically, our mind simply attributes it to the next best thing. And the problem is, the moment our mind conmes to a conclusion, it's so ingrained as a truth it's extremely difficult to debunk or disprove. But I'm digressing.

Still think there's no basis for my idea? How about this: I'm sure we've all heard of doctors who claim that some patients who were not expected to recover, miraculously recovered. Act of God or his angels? Before we go in that direction, how about: Belief? and Will? The patient (and maybe family/friends) so desperately wanted to recover that his body responded supernaturally. What about those yoga masters who undergo isolation, sensory deprivation and starvation? Mind over matter. Our mind is infinitely powerful, as long as one knows how to use it.

Still not accepting even the slightest possibility that our belief through the millenias could have brought divinity into existence by the mere power of thought? Well how about... oh heck, nothing more to add. I better stop typing. You may not accept it, but it's still a logical thought, right? I welcome arguments.

As an Educator

I'm going to start work as a lecturer soon (though it probably won't be a permanent job just yet). I'm getting pretty nervous. The start of the next semester's just around the corner. And no, it's not a public university and it's not a college, so I suppose that should narrow things down. Not going to name, as I'm still not used to the idea of exposing everything around me (except those I've already exposed on the sidebar).

So far, 25 students are confirmed *gasp*. What? So it's not that much, but it's still the first group of students who's going to depend on me for that subject! *shudder* Having been a tutor didn't seem to help much... sure, those were my students too, but I was there as an assistant. Now, full responsibility is on my shoulders. *sigh* What if I can't impart what I know? What if they don't understand what the freak I'm talking about? How the hell am I going to drag a lecture for two long hours?! What if someone complains? Oh boy... getting out of hand.

Oh well, at least I've seen enough lecturers to know what NOT to do. And I hope they agree to break up the lecture into 2 sessions.

Walk, Don't Run!

I don't know if this situation occurs to people everywhere or not, but there's seem to be a breed of people who took the phrase "Walk, but Don't Run" to heart when applied to road-crossing. Just this morning, as I was driving, three men were leisurely crossing the lane I was on and coming pretty fast. I had to break before I splatter them all over my windscreen. And here they were, strolling along as if nothing had happened, as if I wasn't even on the road!! It's like it's their right to cross anywhere they want and cars have to avoid them rather than the other way around. Course, if it were pretty ladies then it's a different story (*snicker*). It's like this road-crossing equivalent of TV Smith's KLCC (Kuala Lumpur 'Cycle Club).

And speaking of road problems, we Malaysians appear to be rather famous for our statistics on road accidents. Everyone complains about how fast some drivers go in Malaysia. But nobody seems to complain about how slow some of them goes. It's like, I'm on this lane, you all behind me must follow my pace. And this is on the fast lane. Anyone who've driven on Malaysian roads in urban areas (and who drives at least 60 km/h on average) must have met some drivers who, for some reason, drives from 30 to 50 km/h on the fast lane. Flashing and closing in on them won't even make them notice you. Sigh. I don't mind if drivers want to drive slowly, but please do so on the left lanes, don't hog the fast lanes where people want to go faster. It's actually safer if they drive slowly on the left, so the faster drivers don't have to keep overtaking them on the left. The same applies to highways too. But this time, it's those "law-abiding" idiots who fervently stick to the fast lane driving at the permitted maximum speed. Anyone else speeding has to overtake them on the left, cos those "smart" fellas just won't budge, no matter how much you flash them, making it that much more dangerous in high speeds.

On Religion

Before I start, I have a little disclaimer: 1. I am not a religion expert, just your average Malaysian Chinese guy, but I'm going to refer to Christianity mostly; 2. I am not trying to offend or be blasphemous, so to ye of narrow mind, let ye be warned! 3. To non-Christians, please do not take my words too seriously, these are merely my views and my perceptions, which may be wrong and/or inaccurate.

First off, I'd wanted to blog about this for a while already. I just never got started until I read these and this and this. Those links don't really related to what I'm trying to say here but some of the comments do. It's either I don't understand Christianity well enough, or I understand too much of points that most Christians seem to ignore.

I kept thinking about Christianity ever since I found my love. She's a Christian you see, and it seems that both my girlfriend and her mother would really prefer that I convert to a Christian soon. Sigh. Know what? I can't. I'm not an atheist or free thinker; I do believe in divinity, be it a single God or Gods, doesn't matter. A God would have multiple facets or sides and each of those sides could be seen as another entity, so it could be a polytheism technically. My view of God isn't similar to most, if not all, religions (narrow-mindedness reminder!) because I see God as a passive entity. And as such, I don't believe in religions and all they tell of. How can they know? Sure, it's based on holy books or scriptures, but that doesn't guarantee that's what God says (although the faithful would probably start shaking their head and/or cursing me). My point is, how would God be considered as taking an active role in our lives when there are no signs of it?

I used to believe in Christianity, back when I was a kid. But my father forbidded it (he says children must not be influenced so early, let us grow up and decide for ourselves) and really scolded my mother for even taking me to church. So you could say it's a childhood phobia. But as I grew, I saw that the God Christians spoke of isn't all that great. My er4 yi2 (second aunt on my mother's side in Chinese) died of liver cancer. She suffered for years in bed. Her husband became a devote Christian and everyday, pastors and fellow worshippers came from around the area to pray for her health. She died anyway. And my cousin (best friend at the time) and I became estranged cos his father moved and remarried.

Then there's my uncle who's a real hypocrite. Mouthing Christian virtues yet committing the most selfish and self-centered acts to his siblings and relatives. Serves him right for being a lonely old man now. There are others too, pretending to be good Christians yet are rotten when they're outside the church.

My point is not that Christians have to be good. My point is why did God let such things happen? My aunt was a devote worshipper and loved me and my mom very much. Why the hell did God let her die? Yeah, sure, Christians will say that it wasn't God's will, it's just plain bad luck that she was afflicted. Same goes for those who got SARS or were in Afghanistan or Iraq when the US invaded.

There was once this sermon I heard, which says that we should be thankful to God for the good things He provided, but must not blame him for the evil things that befall us. And here I was thinking that is so contradictory. And note that this doesn't just apply to Christians. This applies to most major religions. If God is all-encompassing, shouldn't it be possible for Him to be vengeful and punishing? Why does God not save His faithful, and why does God let live big evil-doers? Hope they will repent? Yeah right, like they will. Wars, famine, crimes, bad things are happening everywhere. Where's God? Does he care? Doesn't seem like He does. He weeps? So He'd rather weep than do something about it? I'm not saying God is bad or lousy, I'm just saying that He's a more passive type than religions try to portray Him (or Them, depending on your beliefs). Ever see any of your non-trivial prayers ever come true? It's never an unexplainable success or good luck. Pray for success? Sure, work hard, get the right connections, and you'll succeed. Exams? Sure, study hard, plan schedule, maintain health, spot questions. Pray for safety? How about good fortune? No, I forgot, there's no such thing as good luck, just bad luck.

One more thing is this: What is Heaven? An eternal realm of light where there's no pain or sorrow. This applies to almost all known major religions right? And I would ask, what else? What else do we do there? Do we just worship and praise God every day eternally? I've never met a Christian who has actually thought about this before. Just what is it can we do in Heaven that's going to last forever? Won't it be a pretty boring place when you do just about the same thing every single day for the rest of eternity? I don't know about you, but the idea of having to live forever in one place and do the same thing over and over again really scares me.

This is even more so if I go there with the knowledge that my parents, relatives, and close friends will never be there. My father's as good a father as you'll ever get. Providing for the family all by himself and raising great kids (shameless vanity!). My mom's a really devoted parent. And I have a wonderful, if sometimes bossy, sister. But they're not Christians; they don't go to church; they don't belong to any religion. By most religions, they're going to Hell. How can this be? What happened to "Love thy neighbour, love thy enemies"? Will God not be compassionate and let all righteous, honest, and hardworking people go to Heaven? Or must they spend an eternity in Hell with murderers and heinous evil simply for the 'sin' of not being a faithful?